9 Tips to Distinguish Flirt from Friendly When a Girl Touches You - AttractionGym (2023)

9 Tips to Distinguish Flirt from Friendly When a Girl Touches You - AttractionGym (1)

If you’re reading this, chances are the touch of a woman is still a mystery to you:

“Does she like me?”

“Is this an invitation to go one step further?”

“Or is she like this with everyone?”

This article helps you get to know exactly what it means when a girl touches you.

What you get:

  • 9 Tips on how to perfectly understand the female touch
  • Most common physical signs a woman is interested in you
  • How to touch her without being creepy
  • When a girl touches you: the difference between friend zone and attraction
  • And a lot more…

By the way, have you seen my free Transformation Kit?

You'll get my best stuff absolutely free: 12 Opening lines that actually work, my 5 best texting tips (including copy-paste lines for Tinder), and the Friendzone Houdini. Download the Transformation Kit here.

When a woman touches you, she often does it deliberately.

But what does it mean?

  • Is she into you?
  • Is she just an open and expressive person?
  • Or does she want to sleep with you?

To answer these questions, we first need to provide some context.

Does she look you in the eye when she touches you?

Did you notice she touches other people too?

Does she touch you in a friendly way?

In this article, we go through all of this and even more.

Starting with…

>> 5 Conversation Topics for Stress-Free Dates.

Tip #1: The insignificant touches (IMPORTANT)

In this tip, we’ll go through neutral touches.

You should be able to identify these signs because most of the time they don’t mean anything.

If you make a move based on these types of touches, chances are you’re going to scare her and ruin your chances.

  • The fist bump
  • The double handshake
  • The pat on the back
  • The “I’ll put my hands on your back to walk past you”, and…
  • The arm around the shoulder

In this case, if she wraps her arm around your shoulder, then chances are she’s interested.

It becomes even more obvious if she leans against your body.

So a touch can be either friendly or intimate.

9 Tips to Distinguish Flirt from Friendly When a Girl Touches You - AttractionGym (2)

But Dan, how am I supposed to differentiate the two?”

Glad you asked.

A neutral touch becomes intimate when:

  • The touch lasts longer than normal (more than a fraction of a second)
  • Her whole body is involved (think of leaning and closeness)
  • She touches you on the front of your body or your lower back
  • If she maintains eye contact for more than three seconds while touching you

If you can tick all four boxes, good news: she’s interested.

>> How to Know She LIKES You: 19 Subtle Yet Clear Signs That Tell All.

Tip #2: When a girl touches you

Sometimes a woman touches you in an intimate way, but it’s not clear whether it’s a sign she’s interested or not.

Suppose you’re in a bar and a cute girl fixes your collar.

9 Tips to Distinguish Flirt from Friendly When a Girl Touches You - AttractionGym (3)


What do you think it means?

“She’s so into me!

Hold on, hold on.

Not necessarily.

Perhaps she hates bad looking collars. Or she’s just a very kind person.

Let’s take another example.

What would you think if she said, “Wait, don’t move” and used her hand to wipe some dust off your cheek?

Does it mean she’s interested?

It depends, man. Context is key.

Is she making seductive eye contact?

If she wipes some dust off your face, one thing is certain:

She feels comfortable around you.

So she’s already a few steps away from being attracted to you.

Well, provided you know how to flirt.

Great. We went through plenty of ambiguous touches.

Let’s keep going with more concrete signs.

Tip #3: Physical signs of female attraction

In this tip, I’ll give you a technique to find out if a girl likes you.

You can be passive about it and wait until she touches you in an intimate way.

But a test is way more effective.

On top of that you show leadership and as a result, increase your attraction.

The test is quick, simple and will give you immediate results.

What’s the secret?

Hold her hand.

9 Tips to Distinguish Flirt from Friendly When a Girl Touches You - AttractionGym (4)

Now I’m not saying you should hold hands like a 12 years old couple at a school party.

Keep it brief and relaxed.

Let’s say you’ve been chatting with a girl in a bar for a few minutes and you’re not sure if she’s interested.

Take her by the hand, lead her to another room and say: “I know a cool spot. Let’s go.”

So you’re only holding her hand for about five seconds.

During those five seconds, pay attention to her reaction.

Is her hand slack? In this case, she’s most likely indifferent to you for the moment. You might have a chance.

Does she pull her hand away? Then she’s obviously not interested.

Does she grab your hand back and follow you to the other room? Congratulations, man. She’s clearly into you and very curious as to where you’re taking her.

(Video) Online Flirten op WhatsApp, Tinder, & Datingsites: 5 Tips

>> How to Kiss Properly – from Novice to Master in 15 Tips.

Pro tip:

If you want to know if a girl likes you but you’re not in a bar or a club, then it can be little weird to grab her hand for no reason.

Do you have a date with a girl from Tinder?

Find a street without a pedestrian crossing.

Then say, “Come, let’s cross” and take her by the hand. As soon as you’re on the other side, let go of her hand.

It’s a great way to know if she’s interested without her even noticing.

Here’s a good alternative to this test: Offer your hand.

Does she accept the invitation? Then that’s also a clear sign she’s interested.

Tip #4: The mysterious female touch

This touch is mysterious because it can mean two opposite things:

Either she’s very interested, or she sees you as her best and cutest buddy.

What am I talking about?

When a girl sits on your lap.

If you’re in a bar and a woman you’ve never met sits on your lap, 99.9996678% of the time it’s a clear sign she’s into you.

But if a girl you’ve known for years does the same, then it just means she trusts you and feels at ease around you.

Because you’ve known each other for so much time, she knows exactly what to expect and doesn’t expose herself to inappropriate behavior.

However, her affection for you doesn’t come out of the blue either.

The girl in the bar barely knows you. You don’t know her any better.

So you’re in the process of creating the relationship.

Pretty much everything she does and says shows whether she’s interested or not.

If a lady you don’t know sits on your lap, she’s saying implicitly:

>> 7 Steps to Get a Girl in Bed Without Offending or Loosing Her.

“I feel comfortable in your personal space. I also enjoy sitting on you.”

9 Tips to Distinguish Flirt from Friendly When a Girl Touches You - AttractionGym (5)

Let’s keep going with the next tip.

Tip #5: The art of teasing (and how women do it)

You might think that only men tease women and not the other way around.

No, my friend. Women are just way more subtle than we are.

But what kind of mysterious techniques do women use to express interest?

There’s a lot of them, so let’s start with the first one.

>> List of Facial Expression (With Examples) + The 5 Looks Women Find Most Attractive.

The playful nudge.

Let’s suppose you meet a girl in a bar and you start talking to her.

You’ve been chatting for a few minutes and you start playing around because she forgot your name.

(Video) How to get your Gym Crush to Approach YOU

“Wow! I’m offended! Don’t you ever listen?”

She laughs back and says “Well, I’ll remember now!” and playfully nudges you on your arm.

9 Tips to Distinguish Flirt from Friendly When a Girl Touches You - AttractionGym (6)

After teasing you, a girl will often minimize the impact of the joke by giving you a playful nudge.

This is a major sign she likes you.

Tip #6: Crucial information about female touch

When a girl touches you, the most important thing to analyze isn’t so much where exactly she puts her hand.

You should get the whole picture.

What do I mean by that?

Every micro-expression is important.

“Wow… Imagine seeing pictures of these micro expressions? This would help me so much” A soon-to-be-happy reader

Voilà. You’re welcome.

9 Tips to Distinguish Flirt from Friendly When a Girl Touches You - AttractionGym (7)

In this picture, you see a beautiful girl with her hands on my right arm.

This touch alone doesn’t say enough about what’s going on inside her head.

But look at her gaze. Look at how close she is.

My interest calculator is detecting very high interest.

So the touch matters but not as much as the whole picture.

  • How close is she to you?
  • Is she standing next to you (more neutral) or in front of you?
  • Is she leaning slightly backward or forwards?
  • Does she look at you in the eyes or does she look away?
  • Is she licking her lips?

These micro-expressions are a great way to know if a girl is attracted to you.


Tip #7: Get her to touch you

In this tip, you’ll get to know the best way to have a woman touch you.

We discussed earlier how women touch men to show interest.

So the more interest and attraction you arouse, the more likely she is to touch you, right?

Not exactly.

A girl can be attracted to you physically but if you give off a bad vibe, chances are she’ll run away in no time.

Bars are full of handsome-but-creepy drunk guys that scare off girls with terrible pick-up lines.

When you meet a woman, not only do you want to be attractive but you also want to display reliability.

A balance between attraction and reliability is the key to have a woman touch you more often.

So let’s talk about reliability… How do you become more reliable?

It’s simple.

Don’t be like the average drunk Andy.

When he meets a woman, the average drunk Andy is too touchy. He invades her personal space without even noticing.

You should always respect a woman’s personal space.

This way girls are going to feel more comfortable around you, and little by little they’ll trust you more.

(Video) When Girls Check Out Guys At The Gym

“But Dan, I don’t touch women at all. That’s why I’m reading this article.”

I got you, brother.

For you, I have the following advice:

Let’s suppose you’re in a club and you’ve been talking to a girl for more than five minutes.

Now it’s time to make her feel attraction. Otherwise, you’re going to lose your chance.

How do you do that?

Start with innocent touches.

My favorite is the backhand touch.

9 Tips to Distinguish Flirt from Friendly When a Girl Touches You - AttractionGym (8)

The backhand touch is the best way to touch a girl without violating her personal space and coming off as a creeper. (As shown in the picture above.)

You’re behaving in a way that’s going to make her think:

“Great. Finally, a decent guy. He clearly has experience with women.”

Does she allow you to touch her, or even better, does she touch you back?

Then it’s time to take a step forward.

A lot of our clients struggle with this part, so let’s talk about it in the next tip.

>> Flirting With a Girl Over Text: 7 Must-Have Tips with Examples.

Tip #8: How to touch a girl without being creepy

If you don’t know how to touch women in the right way, your love life is going to suffer.

On top of that, lack of human touch is dangerous to your well-being.

Studies have shown that touch is crucial to our overall health.

Even a simple pat on the back can be very powerful. Students who sometimes receive pat on the back from their teachers are 3 times more inclined to speak in class.

So if you ask me, learning how to touch is a MUST.

Tip #9: The controversial step towards having more success with women

If you apply the tips in our articles, you’re on your way to meet way more women.

Little by little, you should stop spending too much time analyzing touches.

Knowing what it means when a girl touches you is great, but don’t lose sight of the goal:

Flirting with women.

And how do you do that?

By being charismatic, teasing, telling stories, and flirting.

Here’s a toolkit to start becoming that guy right away.

It includes all of the best tips for making yourself an attractive man.

You get:

  • The best opening lines to get her hooked
  • Tips on how to keep the conversation going
  • Easy way to develop your charisma
  • Step-by-step instructions for attracting women
  • And much more…

You can find it all in my free Transformation Kit. Download it here!

Your bro,
Dan de Ram


How do you know if a girl is flirting or just being friendly? ›

Here are some signs you should look out for, according to experts.
  • They Make It Known That They're Single. ...
  • They've Started To Ask You More Thoughtful Questions. ...
  • There's A Noticeable Change In Their Behavior When You're Around. ...
  • They're Super Attentive And Engaging During Conversations. ...
  • They Ask For Your Help A Lot.
23 May 2019

What does it mean when a female touches you? ›

Small touches and gestures are a good sign that a woman likes you. If she playfully pats your arm or rubs against you while you are sitting down, it means she wants to be closer to you. She also might want to hug you or be open to an invitation to be hugged. Please pay attention to how frequently she touches you.

What does it mean if a girl touches your arm? ›

This may suggest that she likes you and your company. She might even flirt with you to let you know that she's interested. Keep an eye on her gaze; if she looks at you longingly while holding your arm, she's into you.

What does it mean when a girl touches you a lot? ›

If you are looking for signals a girl is interested in you one of the best signs to look for when reading body language is touch. The more a girl touches you the more she's flirting and looking for your attention. And the more intimate the touch, the more interest she is showing.

How do girls flirt with boys? ›

Try this instead: Make great eye contact while talking to him. It's sexy, smart, and shows you're really listening. Laughing can be a great way to flirt—when things are genuinely funny. But if you're speaking to a man and you laugh at everything he says, you'll confuse him and come off looking a little ditzy—or nuts.

How do you tell if she only likes you as a friend? ›

Here are the signs to know that she doesn't like you more than a friend:
  1. She doesn't go on one-on-one dates with you. ...
  2. She doesn't show romantic affection towards you. ...
  3. You've witnessed her flirt with other guys. ...
  4. She talks to you about her dating life. ...
  5. She doesn't worry about her appearance around you.
16 Mar 2021

How do I touch her thighs? ›

How To Touch A Woman TO Turn Her On - YouTube

Is touching flirting? ›

When someone is really interested in another person they will often look for any excuse to talk with you and make physical contact in some way. If you touch someone and they respond in a similar manner it is almost certainly flirting.

Does a girl like you if she lets you touch her? ›

Touch Doesn't Lie

If she likes being touched by you, she's attracted to you. Note that this applies to even “accidental” touch. If you're walking next to her and you bump into her a little bit and she starts walking closer to you, that's a sign of attraction.

What does it mean when a girl touches the back of your neck? ›

If she touches your arm, neck or your face, she is telling you that she wants to touch you more intimately. She might even touch herself to draw your attention to her body.

Why do girls touch my hair? ›

Hair is often seen as a sign of attractiveness, so if a girl touches your hair, it can be a sign that she's interested in you. It can also be a way to play with your hair or to get a closer look at you. In any case, it's usually a good sign if a girl touches your hair.

How do girls flirt with you? ›

She's definitely flirting if she looks at you frequently, teases you, touches you when she's excited or happy, or texts you random, funny things. She might be flirting if she laughs at your stories, calls you nicknames, makes up excuses to talk to you, or adjusts her body language toward you.

How do you know a flirt is serious? ›

It's important to take note of these signs so you can tell if it's time for a change in the way you approach him.
  1. 1) He'll make an effort to reach out to you. ...
  2. 2) He'll try to keep the conversation light. ...
  3. 3) He'll ask questions about your day. ...
  4. 4) Excessive smiling and/or laughing. ...
  5. 5) Body language.

How do you know if your friend likes you but is hiding it? ›

Signs He Likes You Even If He's Hiding It
  1. When he looks at you, he can't help smiling. Once I was out with Sam in a cafe. ...
  2. He always finds excuses to talk to you or spend time together. ...
  3. He asks you a lot of personal questions. ...
  4. He remembers the little details about you. ...
  5. He always makes an effort to keep the conversation going.
5 Jul 2022

How do I know if a girl wants to be more than friends? ›

Signs She Wants to Be More Than Friends
  • She gives you some hints. ...
  • She cares about you as your girlfriend, not as a female friend. ...
  • She spends all her free time with you and responds quickly to your every message. ...
  • She learns more about your friends and family.
18 Aug 2020

What is friendly flirting? ›

1. Flirty: When a person is flirting with you, they might make prolonged eye contact with you. They will look deep into your eyes and will stare at you till you become slightly self-conscious. Friendly: If they are simply being friendly, they will look at you equal amounts of time as they look at others.

What is harmless flirting? ›

What is harmless flirting? Harmless flirting includes things like exchanging compliments, eye contact, or teasing someone without actually pursuing the other person.

What is playful flirting? ›

2. Playful. This type sees flirting as a tool, and they tend to enjoy banter and teasing for the sake of it. Engaging with a playful flirt won't often lead to a serious relationship because this type tends to derive self-esteem from flirting.

How do you tell if she wants to be more than friends? ›

34 Signs She Likes You More Than A Friend
  1. She flirts with you. ...
  2. She starts taking an interest in your life. ...
  3. She finds opportunities to touch you. ...
  4. She mirrors your body postures. ...
  5. She communicates her feelings through body language. ...
  6. She smiles more when you are around. ...
  7. She doesn't like to see you with other women.

How can you tell if someone is attracted? ›

Read on for more interesting signs of attraction, according to experts.
  • Their Pupils Are Dilated. ...
  • They Aren't Blinking As Often. ...
  • They Can't Stop Fidgeting. ...
  • They Angle Their Bellybutton Towards You. ...
  • They Lean Back In Their Chair. ...
  • They Change The Tone Of Their Voice. ...
  • They Seem Like They're Glowing. ...
  • They Seem Flushed.
19 Jun 2019

How do you tell if a woman wants you to approach her? ›

  • 6 Signs a Woman Wants to Be Approached by You. ...
  • She's looking around the room. ...
  • She meets your eye and smiles. ...
  • She starts preening whenever you look at her. ...
  • She says things just to you or that seem directed at you. ...
  • She moves closer. ...
  • She sets up a situation where you might run into each other.


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